In my post The Taylor Way: My Connection I mentioned that I will be publishing this post. Looking back over the last 9 years, I can honestly say that my mental health is a journey. I came from the darkest place in my life, healed and then stumbled. Now I am in a phase of restoration and moving forward.
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Over these nine years I have learned a lot about who I am as a person. The biggest thing I learned is I am way stronger then I thought but not as strong as people think I am. This comes from the fact that I am high functioning and I have always been. I will put things in place to help me through the tough things. My doctor says I know my limits and how to work around them.
One of the biggest things I had to learn is to break down the myths surrounding mental health. The five biggest myths that affect me personally are:
2. You need a career to be successful.
3. PTSD only happens to soldiers and first responders.
4. Women give birth all the time and it doesn’t affect their mental health.
5. God doesn’t give you more then you can handle.
It’s taken me years to confront each of these. Your not good enough came from the fact that in a lot of ways, I can’t change things with Lilly. I can throw all the therapy at her but she doesn’t respond in the same way as A-man does. When you don’t see success it’s hard to feel like your a good Mom but that is a huge lie. I am good enough, correction I am a kick ass person!
“How nice that you chose to be a stay at home mom” Honestly I just want to yell when someone says that to me. Our society doesn’t validate stay at home moms which causes this huge lie that you need a career to be successful. The Hubby claims I am one of the most successful people he knows because I keep this family running; and it’s taken me a while to believe it.
Nine years ago when I was discharged, the words postpartum depression and baby blues were mentioned but no one really talked about the trauma I went through. No one really connected the dots until years later. It took a lot to break down myths 3 and 4. Nowadays, NICU PTSD is more talked about thanks to social media and new words are mentioned like PICU and caregiver PTSD.
The last myth God doesn’t give you more then you handle is the one that frustrates me the most! My baby wasn’t even out of NICU and well meaning people where saying it to me. At my most valuable moment I couldn’t handle it. It took someone a few years later to say, “Hun, God does give you more then you can handle that is how you stretch in Him.” She was right because it is through His strength, wisdom, knowledge and understanding that I get through the gross stuff. Sometimes I really hate how I am stretched but after that period I have a deeper relationship with Him.
This post is longer than I thought it would be so on August 7, 2018 I will be publishing a post called Mental Health- My Tool Box. In that post, I will be talking about the tools I use to take care of my mental health including why I prefer coaching.
If you are struggling with mental health issues, please seek out professional help. I have in the past and seen success. Personally I use The Taylor Way (and if you use my affiliate code TTWA25, you can get $25 off the online courses).