Being Closer To God · Christian Living

Momma Confessions: Broken Hearted

I have been quite on here because I have been in a stage of regroup. The month of December was supposed to be the start of a 3 month hiatus from medical needs. It didn’t work out that way and I found myself just as busy as ever with medical appointments and viruses. My careful placed armour finally cracked.The break that I desperately needed just wasn’t possible.

My folks stepped up and took the children so I could rest. I spent one weekend just sleeping because I needed it. The Hubby was worried because I slept so much but it was just my body catching up on some much needed sleep. Once I was rested I had the energy to figure out what were my heart issues.

For me I define heart issues are things that are rubbing my soul/spiritually the wrong way.

Lilly was off of school for a total of three weeks for Christmas. The first week and half we were down right sick but then we came out of the haze. That’s when something magical happened for the first time since PICU I started to see my daughter again and not the disease.

You see Brian Injuries is a disease. There is no cure for grey matter and when it affects the area that control behaviour it affects your child’s daily behaviour. For the last 5 months we have seen more of the destructive behaviour then our sweet Lilly. It wears on your soul down when your child doesn’t act themselves.

A few things happened during that break that gave me HOPE. I switched back to a routine that I did with Lilly when she was younger that ended up with her thriving. I basically started homeschooling Lilly and A-man again. Lilly’s tone and spasticity came under control during that time. My munchkin’s negative behaviour dropped significantly and she was truly happy.

I’m not fully healed and that will take time but for the first time in a long time I have HOPE again in my heart and that is the most powerful thing I women can have.

Blog post in this series are:

Momma Confessions: A Discouraged Heart

Momma Confessions: Goals Based On Joy

Momma Confessions: Fitness Goals

Momma Confessions: Home Based Therapy

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