There I said it; my husband doesn’t let me out of the house! Here’s another one; I do not let my husband out of the house alone! When he is not working his fifty plus work week we are one hundred percent connected at the hips. We can not think, eat or go to the bathroom alone let alone be somewhere with out the kids, (other than date night.)
All these statements are false when it comes to The Hubby and I but there seems to be this stereotype out there that if we are out in public alone we have been let out of the house by the other spouse.
Until recently I never thought about it much but The Hubby started to grumble about this stereotype. Then one day he said to me, “You need to write a post about this.”
This conversation all started with people, (with good intentions) making little comments like “Oh you must have snuck out of the house for breakfast,” and “What a treat to allow your wife to go to church with out the kids.” When we have attended things separate and alone.
As we came across these comments I just let roll of my back but The Hubby grumbled loud to me and I told him to ignore them. But two weeks ago I sat in prayer meeting, (yes by myself, and alone) I came to a realization.
That night I told The Hubby I will be writing a post about this! (Which made him happy)
A little over a year ago God convicted us on something; if we didn’t make time for church and fellowship we will always be too busy for it. That to grow in him and our marriage we needed to be rooted in our home church and in fellowship with people.
You can not do that by staying at home.
I often hear “the children are only little for a short time, in the future there will be time for other stuff.” For most families this is probably true but for us it is not because Lilly has stayed in stages longer than her peers. Plus I have observed some things get replaced by worldly commitments if you let them.
As a couple we together we decided to make some changes to how we run our household.
- If The Hubby is working I have caregivers set up so I can attend Ladies Ministry events. This includes leading bible studies and attending ladies retreats.
- If The Hubby makes it home in time for prayer night one of us is to attend. (We decide the night of and this doesn’t happen often because of work schedule.)
- When The Hubby is able (not working) he is to attend Monday Prayer Breakfast with some friends.
- One of us should be attendance at church even of the children can not go, (sickness, over tired, ect..) First priority is goes to the person who is serving at church, and then often we switch back and forth between us.
- I am to tell The Hubby when fun invites come in. I don’t make all the baby showers, blessing showers, Ladies night and other fun planned activities but at least we try.
This has been quite an adjustment and we have even had to deny ourselves of somethings like date nights so we can have caregivers for Church things.
Glancing back at the last year this is the most we have attended church as a couple and individually since having kids. Another benefit we have noticed is our daughter is less sick and not as sever as she used to be. (Sickness can be used to keep us away from God’s house)
Do you also come across the stereotype that your spouse “lets” you do things?