Sharing my personal journey with PTSD .
Next week is Lilly’s last week of school and quite frankly it scares me. In the last few months we got into a really good routine and now there is a new wrench into the system. Managing Lilly’s low mobility activities and keeping A-man busy can be challenging. I’ve gotten into the habit of doing higher mobility activities with A-man while Lilly is at school and well that is coming to an end. My life is about to get crazy busy.
The thought of how busy life is about to get is exhausting!
Last fall I had an out of control toddler with major social anxiety issues on my hands. Any social situation A-man would spend crying and squealing out of control. It was awful and it got to the point where I hated going out with my children. I would avoid even having tea with friends.
The answer is no Lilly isn’t my daughter’s name. Actually I hardly ever use real names in my post. The only time I use real names is if it’s a sponsored post or I have the person’s permission.
Because I value my children’s privacy. This is my blog, my thoughts not there’s. One day they will have a life of their own and they may not want to associated to Mommas Wonderings. (Especially during those awkward teen years.) I believe my children have their own story to tell.
When I first started blogging under my old blog a lot of my earlier post where more centred around Lilly. One of the things The Hubby and I discussed was how much info did we want to put out there about our family. As I grew as a blogger I started to re-examine how I wrote.
My writing style changed to a more neutral style. I like inspiring readers and often try to write post that reflect that.
Some people did not like the change because they missed the more personal note of the blog. Yes, I still have post that include the children but the post needs to fit into my brand image and not be just a random post.
My original blog was named Lilly Through The Valley. Lilly was the name we chose to use instead of her real name. The Through The Valley came from the fact we are going through the recovery of a brain injury. I loved the blog but I made a lot of rookie mistakes on it.
When I got pregnant with A-man I also came to the realization that I had a whole blog focused on Lilly. One of the things we work on is balancing out Lilly`s needs with the rest of the families.
Lilly`s medical needs can consume our family life if we allow it. I didn`t want a brand that excluded A-man. I made the hard decision to phase out Lilly Through The Valley and start Mommas Wonderings. One of the things I kept was the names.
As life changes I am finding sometimes our personal life blends with the blog and that is okay. After all these years writing with the names A-man and Lilly it`s just second nature for me now.
If A-man decides to one day start-up a blog called, “The Real A-man” I wouldn’t be too sad.
This post is linked up at Bloggers Link-Up
The Hubby works hard to provide for our family, and often miss dinner. He also is addicted to food shows and his Facebook wall is full of food ideas. When I meal plan I try to include a few of these ideas on days I am guarantee that he will be home. I also try to make food that tastes good re-heated so that he has something to eat whenever he rolls through the door.
Have you been overwhelmed with all the social media options out there? There is always seems to be a new course or email that will guarantee an increase your page views, bounce rates or followers. I know because I have been reading them and have been trying to bring up my page views. Truthfully it has left me feeling overwhelmed.
Then something happened in the last week.A post that I threw together last minute and didn’t really advertise did better than all the glamour post I have been putting out lately.
If you follow my Facebook page or Instagram account you may have noticed pictures and videos of Lilly driving a motorized wheelchair for the first time last Thursday. This is a huge step for Lilly. Last fall her specialist decided that it was time for her to explore motorized wheelchairs because Lilly has trouble keeping up her energy levels.
He was concerned that once you add walking to her day to day life she would not have the energy to use her manual wheelchair all the time.
The easiest way to explain Lilly’s energy output is that the type of brain injury she has every day activities such as drawing, colouring, singing, and playing is a lot of work for her. It causes her to burn double and sometimes even triple the amount of energy then someone her age. The surgery plus being able to walk again is going to take a lot out of her.
When Lilly got her first wheelchair the physical therapist warned us that most children do not get a powered wheelchair until age 10. The Hubby and I were fine with that and both of us wanted her to learn to use a manual wheelchair independently first. Our biggest fear was that her right arm would not develop. Lilly is a quadriplegic due to the type of brain injury she has. At birth both arms where really affected but thanks to lots of physical therapy her left arm is typical functioning now.
The biggest question her team members have is Lilly going to pick up how to drive a wheelchair? The Hubby and I just smiled at this question. Since a young age Lilly has been interested in tractors, quads, and well basically anything with a motor. She had a little tractor that we rigged up for her to drive as a toddler.
How quickly Lilly picked up on the wheelchair did not surprise us.
Once she got used to being something new she quickly realized how to push the button to go and stop. Thankfully they had Lilly’s wheelchair on the lowest setting or she would have taken off on us. While Lilly was zooming around in her wheelchair A-man followed suite in her manual wheelchair.
Thursday was the start of a journey to the next level of independence for Lilly. It will be interesting to see where this will take her. Good news for Mommy is that there is a parent control break.
When I first started blogging I had no idea how much I would fall in love with it. I remember how scared I was to hit publish on that first post. My biggest fear was that no one would like what I had to say.
Since hitting publish on the first post I have become a blog addict. It’s my most consistent hobby. My numbers are not 100,000 page views a day like other blogs but I am okay with that. (Well most of the time)
Mommas Wonderings will be 3 this September and I am very happy with how the last few years have turned out. Yes, I did not become a huge name blogger but the biggest reward is personal. Blogging has made a huge impact on who I am today.
I’m Not Alone As a mom raising an Atypical child I felt very alone in the world when I first started blogging. At that point in my life I had not met many other mom’s on the same path as I. Through blogging I found other mom’s raising Atypical children. I even read post of them dealing with similar situations and it makes me feel like I wasn’t the only person experiencing these things.
Passion I’m a Stay At Home mom due to Lilly’s needs. Going back into the career I had before I had Lilly is just not an option. Trying to figure out what is the next step professionally has been frustrating. I have found that blogging has given me a passion to develop myself. When things are grey and ugly with Lilly’s medically that’s when I do my best brain storming. It fuels me to think about what the future may hold.
The Challenge I hated computer class, in fact if my friends didn’t help me I probably would have failed the class. I never took a business class in my life and branding was word I had no idea about before I started blogging. In the last 5 years I have learned so much about graphics, SEO, Social Media and now Blogging Law & Business. There is always a new challenge to conquer.
Advocacy In the last few months I have been stretching myself with writing more controversial post such as Dear Sophie and Transgender Bathrooms. The reason why is as Lilly grows older I want to be able to advocate for her needs. Also I like to advocate for women. By writing post on things that I have gone through I can help another women going through a similar situation.
Stress Relief Blogging is my favourite stress relief. When my fingers hit the keyboard I forget things like surgeries, weird physical regression issues and all the other stress-ors in my life. It’s my grown up outlet and I love it.
I do not know if I am meant to be a full-time blogger but right now I am enjoying writing. Please tell me why you love blogging.